Breakthrough

“Hi” That’s the only word that escaped the prison that was mouth
While others such as radiant, angelic, and beautiful were hidden and restrained to my mind
I somehow managed to trap every corny line, every question about the weather.
Every thought of doubt telling me to just turn and walk away, all these thoughts were over whelmed by this message from my heart telling me to stay, that I should try and conversate. So I forced myself to open my mouth once again and string together some syllables hoping that this would explain to her and I why my behavior might be dismissible and why I stood here trying desperately to match her snow white smile with mine. But again things would not be fine, see this time what was said almost caused my heart to stop. For the words that came next were of the utmost shock! “My name is Drae, and I would love to know your name?”
What was happening what could I be thinking, why would my body not respond to the warning signs that kept blinking! “She’s out of your league” Everyone else noticed so why couldn’t you see. But I do see, it’s simple she is clearly too good for me. OK deep breaths just breathe, just turn to her say......... “I’m sorry for wasting your time but I think I should just leave!” Alright OK no need to be ashamed I think everything should be OK if I just politely say it this way.
Or should I, must I this one time be brave should I attempt to advance this convo to a stage where somehow some way I end of this day and finish atop of this, one of life’s games. Likewise will the result be the unwavering same ass everything I’ve ever strived for, will I simple fail! Will my dreams once again collapse under the pressure, like a house built upon the sand and furthermore without the support of nails.
My mind is or would be content with the defeat while my heart it screams, it fiends, it desperately wishes to complete its dreams. Dreams so simply deemed to love, to hurt, to feel, to be released upon this world but at this moment most currently upon this girl. So I face her, engage her, each word from my heart spoken decisive and sharp, turning this simple conversation into a complex simplicity of art. My words are the tools inflaming her mind leaving ripples in her curiosity as the master piece comes into place colors red, blue, and green vibrant and sharp. I tip toe, for the future with her I’m still unsure......... see what I do now.... is that with the words that flowed I showed to her and me that I COULD! Also that I would no longer be held back, for with this crack in the dam of my soul; confidence, strength, knowledge, and wisdom came pouring out the measure of which for now I’ll never know.
So you wonder whatever happened to the girl that was the source of this poem, well aware her mind I did blow.......... sadly but surely she did say no! ; )

The Black Star

© 2009 Andre brown